Fighting Depression with Gratitude and Healthy Pride

The Voice of Depression

As I listen to an individual with severe symptoms of clinical depression, the inner emotions I often experience are that of heartbreak. After practicing psychology for almost 15 years, it has become clear to me that depression is a condition that preys on self-loathing and feelings of worthlessness for nourishment. If it had a voice, this is what depression would say to its suffers:

“I can’t believe you just did that. You are horrible.”
“You don’t bring much value to the world.”
“Your family is better off without you.”
“When you call them, you always bother them.”
“Don’t ask for help – they don’t want to help you.”
“You screwed up again. It’s always your fault.”
“You can’t do anything right.”
“You are a fraud.”

Working with individuals diagnosed with severe depression is challenging, mostly because their feelings of low self-worth and low self-value seem harshly branded to their identity. While there is an abundance of therapeutic techniques (from a variety of psychological approaches) to help depression sufferers, I’d like to take a different approach today to discuss the benefits of implementing positive psychology techniques (in adults and especially in early childhood development) as a proactive solution to widespread clinical depression.

Positive Psychology: An Understanding

Positive psychology is the study of the variables and processes that lead to increased mood and positive emotions. Essentially, this approach investigates the conditions that contribute to mental wellness as opposed to mental illness. Positive psychology recognizes that clinical psychology focuses on illness and the management of negative emotions as opposed to elements needed to thrive and flourish. Positive psychology wishes to compliment the existing knowledge of pathology, distress, and dysfunction by studying contrasting elements like, resilience, strength, and growth.
Traditional psychology’s focus on mental illness does, however, make sense from an evolutionary perspective. In the name survival, the use of negative emotions was imperative for early humans. Put plainly, negative emotions allowed us to survive - fear allowed us to run from a large predator, anger gave us the strength to fight opponents, and disgust forced us to avoid the poison berries. Positive emotions, on the other hand, were futile. In the modern world, however, concepts such as mindfulness, gratitude expression, and appreciation exercises promote an increase in mood and are indispensable in achieving well-being. There is even scientific proof that positive psychology strategies can decrease visits to the doctor and increase prominence of positive emotions.

Results of Looking to the Positive

When most people think of “being more positive,” they might picture that obnoxiously happy Friends character, played by Alec Baldwin whom everyone wanted to slap by the end of the cameo. Truth is, strategies like writing a gratitude letter or celebrating the day’s accomplishments can bring down depressive symptoms and increase happiness. Sound too good to be true? Well, it’s not. Empirical research demonstrates that writing one gratitude letter made subjects less depressed and happier one week after their letter was written. Acknowledging character strengths (qualities or positive personality traits) made individuals happier and less depressed one whole month after the experiment was over (Seligman & Steen, 2005). Could you imagine the kind of mood you could create if you practiced these types of exercises a few times per week? My opinion - The mental health benefits would be endless.

“A grateful mind is a great mind which eventually attracts to itself great things.” - Plato

Why It Works?

When people roll their eyes at self-help activities like gratitude journals, they fail to understand the long-term effects these types of activities have on the brain. Neurochemicals released from the positive emotions elicited through gratitude facilitate resiliency, problem solving, and a broad open-minded perspective. In other words, these emotions allow you to see the big picture instead of being stuck in box of negative thoughts and possibilities…that inevitably lead to depression. For anyone reluctant or cynical about gratitude journals, the fact that these activities cause a certain chemical reaction in the body that give way to positive emotions, should be enough of a-kick-in-the-butt to reconsider their hesitancy.

Suggestions on How to Apply Gratitude and Healthy Pride into Your Life

As discovered by Seligman and Steen (2005), writing a gratitude letter can have lasting health effects. They found that expressing your gratitude to someone for whom has not been properly thanked, will help increase positive emotions. So ask yourself, who would you like to thank? Why would you like to thank them? What will you say? After pondering these questions, write your message of gratitude and (most importantly) send it off! Your children can also benefit from this type of activity. You can alter the activity depending on your child’s stage of development. For younger children, it would be beneficial to simply maintain a gratitude list that becomes part of a bedtime routine. Ask them what they are most grateful for, everyday, before bed. It would be easiest, especially for young children, to simply choose experiences from that very day.
Another strategy that I find most useful in increasing positive emotions is acknowledging one’s own character strengths. What amazing characteristics did you show today? Were you resilient? Were you kind? Did you display integrity at work? Were you creative? Did you show fairness? We often bypass our amazing personality traits and become preoccupied with our mistakes and flaws. Acknowledging our strengths everyday on purpose has true health benefits, as evidenced by the research.

Importantly, asking your children what they are proud of after a long day can be most beneficial to combat future depression. As mentioned earlier, depression is a condition that feeds on low self-esteem and self-disrespect. It is therefore important that we get our children in the habit of knowing their strengths and positive characteristics, early in life. And let’s lay it on thick – let’s celebrate personality traits like, curiosity, honesty, social intelligence, prudence, and self-regulation. We are too often focused on the duality of good or bad, but what about giving them an abundant vocabulary of character traits. We must celebrate our great ones and allow the others to be a work in progress. Highlighting positive personality characteristics displayed on any given day truly has the potential to help us in the fight against mental illness in the long-term.

Seligman, M., and Steen, T. (2005). Positive psychology progress: Empirical validation of interventions. American Psychologist, 60(5), 410-421.